A day in the life of …. ME

8:38am – Holy smokes that was a good sleep. I didn’t stir once. Who turned the TV off? Last I knew I was watching Seinfeld? Where’s Monty? Wow, he’s still sleeping too!
8:39am – Relief. Wow did I have to pee.
8:42am – Still really windy. Sounded like a jet above the house last night it was so windy.
8:43am – Uh oh! Birds are out of seed! They could be here soon for their morning bird party.
8:45am – Let Monty out. Fill up bird feeders.
8:48am – House is intact. Garbage can only blew a few inches over. White eavestrough extender blew off and 6 feet across the back yard!
8:50am – Feed Monty.
8:51am – Tell Zeus it’s fire time.
8:53am – Take some wood stove ashes outside. Close eyes and jump back as I throw ashes into the wind on the driveway.
8:54am – Resume fire building.
8:55am – Turn on a Bubba the Love Sponge replay to listen to.
9:00am – Hug and squeeze a needy Zeus.
9:05am – Swat Zeus’s tail away from the stove.
9:15am – Close up damper and declare fire officially going.
9:16am – Turn on TV. Decide to watch a movie. Once that Jeff likely wouldn’t watch if he was home. Check the PVR to see what I’ve recorded lately. Settle on “Gnomeo & Juliet”.
10:40am – That was an awesome movie! All about animated garden gnomes. Lots of Elton John music in the sound track. Feel inspired to decorate our lawn with 100 or so cute garden gnomes. Think of Jeff’s reaction if I did this before he returned from Ontario. Snicker. Wonder where I could get gnomes in January.
10:45am – Hit Randomizer on Elton John on my iPhone, hook iPhone into speaker dock, crack Elton, commence singing/shower/dance party.
11:00am – Trim toenails.
11:01am – Think about what a good idea it would be to do a day in the life of post about myself.
11:12am – Start blog post and make up times from 8:38 until now.
11:27am – Only 3 birds out there. Maybe it is too windy and they are hiding out somewhere. Wish a blue jay would come and eat his peanuts.
11:32am – Surfing web. See there is a fracking protest disrupting traffic near the Canso Causeway. Think about joining protesters. Remember Jeff is not here to bail me out of jail. Decide to protest from afar.
11:34am – Cave. Open bag of licorice all-sorts I bought Dad for his birthday. Oops.
11:36am – Realize I have a lot of music shuffling on my iPhone that I don’t like. Switch to listen to a Shannon Burke radio show re-run. I haven’t listened to this guy much, but I’m a talk radio nut and need to branch out and not listen to Howard Stern re-runs of shows I listened to live.
11:45am – Fill up dishwasher and turn it on.
11:50am – Publish a couple stories for my ForestTalk website.
12:00pm – Text with Julie as she is heading with Mom to meet my husband and his parents for lunch. I guess if they can’t have lunch with me, tracking down my husband is the next closest thing. I hope they squeeze and hug him and pretend he is me 🙂
12:15pm – Kiss Monty on his whitening snout and let him outside. I think he’s still looking for Jeff to come home.
12:20pm – 19 mourning doves arrive at bird feeder (some under it, some resting in tree). 1 evening grosbeak, some goldfiches, and chickadees.
12:24pm – Let Monty in. Get new box of kleenex from the pantry for my office.
12:34pm – Decide it is time for some outdoor exploration time.
1:17pm – Back inside. Monty and I went for a walk around the yard, then we went up in the woods and walked around the back of our lot. Realized Monty doesn’t seem to put himself in my shoes when he is leading the way. We walked around trees and zig zagged here and there, sniffed deer poop, stopped twice to unhook my glasses from tree branches, but I drew the line at walking under dead hanging logs at knee height. Headed home and I took a nice little meditational stretch on the porch swing. Smelling the wood smoke in the air, listening to the wind in the trees, the birds in the trees, the cool air pinking my cheeks.
1:21pm – I see more birds have showed up at the feeder. The finches are actually picking away at the niger seed too. Usually they ignore that feeder in the winter and just hit the sunflower seeds.
1:30pm – Random internet browsing. Need to update ForestTalk theme. Think I’d rather nap.
2:15pm – Julie is texting me about her lunch with Jeff and his parents.
2:22pm – Turn on TV
2:25pm – Go downstairs to rake out hot coals. Open damper a bit to help burn off coals for next reload.
2:30pm – Vacuum dog hair out of electric baseboard in front hallway. It could be heading to -17°C on Sunday night so I should get a couple baseboards ready to go on to help keep the house from freezing.
2:37pm – See I missed a call while I had the vacuum on.
2:37pm – Call Jeff back. Listen to complaints about his gravy being too light at lunch. Thinking I haven’t eaten lunch. I could use a hot turkey sandwich and gravy. Tease Jeff about having all the baseboards on and sitting in shorts in a 26 degree house. Ha ha sucker.
3:07pm – End phone call. Head back to TV.
4:59pm – Did I really just watch Celebrity Wife Swap with Dee Snider and Flavor Flav? What has this day come to?
5:19pm – Just watched the Canadian Parks show about Fathom Five National Park on the Bruce Peninsula. I had no idea that in the 30’s the flower pots of FlowerPot Island were cemented and bricked so they won’t erode or fall over on a tourist.
5:21pm – Fed Monty
5:22pm – Opened up the damper, cracked the wood stove, time for fire #2 of the day.
5:23pm – Seafood Medley is on the menu for Zeus tonight. Fed Zeus his prednisone pill. It is so easy to give him a pill now. He practically opens the hatch himself for me to stuff it in.
5:45pm – Fire ready. Zeus is full and lounging on the dog bed near the wood stove, ready to soak up some heat.
5:55pm – Just made a little plate of crackers, old cheddar, and kielbasa. Mmmm. Listening to Manson’s radio show on RadioIO.
6:09pm – Just saw a tweet that there is a LIVE show on today. Hallelujah. Switching to listen to the Abe Kanan show on Howard 101.
6:30pm – That radio show wasn’t cutting it. Time to dive into YouTube for some educational videos.
6:41pm – AHH! Just bit my tongue. Almost right off I think. Damn licorice.
6:41pm – Sorry licorice, I know it wasn’t your fault.
6:56pm – Monty is whining. Better go investigate.
7:02pm – Monty and I went outside. It is lightly snowing. He didn’t really have to go. I think he was just hoping for a Milkbone when he came back in. Little manipulator. I’m not caving.
7:31pm – Hoodie and sweat pant time. Back on the Abe Kanan show.
7:34pm – Inspiring to make phone calls. First stop. Becky. Haven’t talked to her for eons. Was thinking of our wild night in Halifax and our visit to Peggy’s Cove earlier.
7:35pm – No answer. Left a super lame voicemail. I hate voicemail. Should have been funnier. Can I redo?
7:46pm – Tweaking my blog template.
8:46pm – Just went through hundreds of old emails from 2001’ish to 2007. Copied out photos and saved them separate from the emails. Found some real gems. Even a pic of Julie’s eyebrow ring.
9:00pm – Just became friends with an ol’ friend on Facebook. Love catching up with friends!
9:30pm – Am I really going to watch Jeff’s Denver Broncos? I never have ever watched football by choice. This is new.
9:31pm – Give Monty a rawhide.
10:23pm – Watching Monty rub his face in the snow. Porch is covered already. I’ve been babbling away on Facebook with ol’ friends. Not old friend, just long time friends 🙂 hehe
11:15pm – 42 – 7. Am I jinxing Jeff’s team by watching?
11:20pm – Getting sleepy. Time to check fire. Rake out coals. Room for a few pieces of wood. Let Monty out.
11:29pm – Reflecting on day. 90% unproductive. Just what I needed. I did good!
11:30pm – Let Monty in. He runs straight upstairs to bed ( to wait for his bedtime milkbone)
11:31pm – Monty came back downstairs.
11:33pm – Guessing Jeff has long ago given up on his Broncos and is probably in bed. This game is getting rough. Injured player on every play.
11:35pm – Digging into a new book I finally got my hands on – The UV Advantage.
11:42pm – Oh good, Denver hits double digits. 42-10
11:56pm – I am heading up to bed to read some more about the healing qualities of the sun. Good night. Wait. Text from Dad. Bet he is watching football. Yep.
12:05am – Haven’t made it upstairs yet.
12:14am – K going to bed for real this time. Good night. Sorry about your team Jeff.
12:17am – Football brawl. Damn still didn’t get away.
12:20am – ok for real THIS time. Bye.

Lisa

Lisa (Verkley) Schuyler is a blogger reporting live from her new home in Canada's Yukon Territory. Often found wearing a hoodie, covered in pet hair, Lisa is a mis-placed forester who now spends her days engineering happiness for WordPress users. Lisa loves nature, animals, and most importantly, her handsome husband Jeff.

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