Are the Gods Pissed with Me?

I just experienced a bout of projectile vomiting. Remember how I figured I was good to go with vodka again? Well I only had one! Guess that’ll be the last.

So I flushed, washed up, and went to feed the dogs their nightly banana and pills. Then I hear this noise coming from under the house. The cat started freaking out. It sounds like the fan has come on the furnace! whaaa? It’s a warm night! Maybe I hit the thermostat up by accident. Nope, it’s turned all the way down. My cat is freaked out! So I listen again and I can hear it at a couple of my vents. Maybe the furnace is doing something goofy so I went over to the electricity panel and flicked off the breaker for the furnace. Still hear it. So I flipped off the power for the entire house. Still hear it!!

So I grabbed my flashlight, put on a sweatsuit and dashed outside to crawl under my crawl space. I looked from the door but didn’t see anything so I ducked in a bit more and I see WATER!! AHH! I dove in and turned off the first two water shut offs. Still gushing water EVERYWHERE. So I had to dive into the thick of things, crawling over the gravel on my knees, and find another water shut off tap. As soon as I touched the pipe it started gushing more!! I turn and turn and turn and finally it slows, and finally stops. AHHHHH. I quickly made an exit from under my house, soaked, scared of all the spiders I just got in my hair probably, with massive dents in my knees from diving across the gravel.

So I have a broken water pipe. Right where the grounding wire is attached to the water pipe.

If you recall. I had just puked. I have no water to drink. My brother and his wife are coming in the morning. Tomorrow is a National holiday. And I have no water. And no connections with a plumber.

Bets on how much this will cost me?

And no Dad, I’m NOT trying to fix this myself.

So should I check my PayDay numbers against tonights draw? Nah, I don’t think I need to. I know the answer. Maybe I’ll just go to bed and hope this was a crazy dream.


Lisa (Verkley) Schuyler is a blogger reporting live from her new home in Canada's Yukon Territory. Often found wearing a hoodie, covered in pet hair, Lisa is a mis-placed forester who now spends her days engineering happiness for WordPress users. Lisa loves nature, animals, and most importantly, her handsome husband Jeff.

6 Replies to “Are the Gods Pissed with Me?

  1. oh my, what a week you are having!

    I truly hope you were dreaming!
    And I thought working the weekend was the ultimate!
    Try to have a good one, but I fear this could be a difficult problem to solve this weekend…my payday can’t help, it was a dud!

  2. Well I tried the first plumber. He said it’s a holiday, we’re not supposed to be working, his guys are run ragged today, I might have to wait all day and they still might not get here. Of course he mentioned this all after I said it was in a crawl space. I really think he just couldn’t be bothered to go down there. He told me to call someone else. When prompted, he did recommend another company.
    I called the second company and their on call guy called me back. I think I woke him up. He said he’ll need an hour, but it shouldn’t take long to fix.
    I have this awful oil smell in my house again, due to an oil leak down there last fall. I have had my crawl space door open to clear out the smell and this last week it’s finally gone…. well now it’s back. All that water got the oil soaked earth wet again. Healthy.. I’m sure.
    Of course the cat puked on my bed last night too, so I’m eager to do laundry!

  3. I have water!!
    And what a wonderful man (and mighty fine looking) he said if I pay him today, he won’t charge me double time. With tax, $63!!
    He said that it wasn’t the ground wire attachment, it was actually some sort of water hose, the kind he normally sees for fridges with water dispensers. I don’t have one, and the fridge came with the place so I’m not sure what it was for. I asked if it could have been for the old humidifer on the old furnace I had but he said they’d never put it there with full city pressure. I’m pretty sure I do have one of those attachments, but it’s in a different location so I have no clue what that was for.
    Any who, it’s fixed! So I can start cleaning for Brian and Leanne’s arrival, which shouldn’t be until closer to 4. Whew!

  4. Hey is that great news or what! You have to be more discriptive in telling me your problems. A big/huge difference between a ground wire and a water line! Glad you have it fixed. Have a wonderful rest of Canada Day!

  5. Well it was 1am and it was pouring water all over me. I saw something wire-like and clamped onto the water line, I guess I jumped to conclusions!

    Fireworks tonight!

  6. YUP at Patti-Jo’s Aunt and Uncle’s. They have a wonderful view high on a hill overlooking the lake where the fireworks are set off.

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